Saturday, April 17, 2010

The Real World/Road Rules Challenge - a story of addiction told in pictures

Once again my guiltiest of guilty pleasures has sucked me back in for another season. This time these fame-whore, human petri dishes are destroying some nice place in the woods of British Columbia. What is it about this show that keeps me coming back? It's certainly not the "challenges" which are seriously super lame; and it's not the host TJ Lavin, the biggest stoner on the planet. Does the dude to the left seem like a dynamic tv host? 'Cause he's not. Is this all TJ does now? Is he still a "professional BMX racer" whatever that is?
So if it's not the structure of the show itself, or the host, could it be the cast? You can't call them contestants really, because although there is a monetary prize, these aren't your typical game players, even under reality tv standards.

Yes, as deplorable and disgusting as most of these arseholes are, I find them wildly entertaining. Let's take a look at some of them:
First, I can't talk about the Challenge without talking about Kenny Santucci. Although there were several Challenge seasons televised before Kenny made a strong first impression showing up on the scene in the original "Fresh Meat" competition, he's quickly established himself as MTV's go-to guy for this ridiculous show. I unabashedly and without shame adore Kenny. And when he almost went home this week (in only the 2nd ep of the season!) I was really sad. But hopefully he and Landon can put past differences aside and work together to take control again.

Speaking of Landon. I now pronounce you Husband and Bear.
Sigh...I love Landon to distraction. The dimples, the body of course, his weird high-pitched mid-western accented voice, his sexual charisma that manages to be super-hetero and ambiguously gay at the same time. If Landon is in a Challenge I will always be cheering for him to win, which surprisingly he has not done yet. It's your time baby! Even if you are saddled with big dumb Carley as a partner.

Speaking of dumb, one of this season's mini-serial dramas involves new Fresh Meat girl Theresa, who's paired up with token gay alumn Ryan. Theresa started drama the first night in the house when she got wasted and came on strong to Kenny, propositioning and declaring her lust for him before she'd even been playing the game 24 hours. Kenny turned her offer of sex down. Which she took like a trouper. immediately turning her charms on pasty asshole Wes who gladly agreed to be boot-knockin' buddies with her. Let's take a direct quote from her shall we? "Being considered the 'hot girl' is really awkward. All the guys are very good looking so it's kinda fun. But then again it could be a bad thing". You think?
Ok, first up, who the hell said you were the "hot girl"? You're cute (sort of, I guess) but there are a lot better looking girls in this season's competition, and certainly in the history of the show. Second, your boy crazy ways are going to f*ck you in this game, rookie. And that doesn't bode well for Ryan. Can the cute gay boy ever catch a break in this game?

Finally, you chose Wes? You call this fugly ginger hot? Not only is he a psychopathic loose cannon, he's also insanely competitive and jealous of Kenny, who stole Wes's fiance (the gorgeous, but stupid Johanna). Now Wes has hooked up with Theresa and doesn't yet know that she was Kenny's reject and that he was 2nd choice. Oh, Wes. I'll be seriously disappointed if this king douche wins another Challenge. Especially if Kenny and Landon don't make it to the finals. Now, I have to get back to my tv watching.

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