But today I was watching one of those countdown shows that VH-1 seems to do so often, you know, something like the "100 Greatest Songs about Food" or whatever and the ubiquitous Hal Sparks of course was one of the panelists providing commentary and OH. MY. GOD. What the fawk happened to him?
His hair?! It's long. And stringy, yet flyaway. And greasy, yet frizzy. And he has a soul patch. And strange wrinkles. And geezus, he's only a little bit older than me. Duuuuuuuuuuude.
And besides the occasional stupid VH-1 gig, what has he been up to lately? Any real jobs? You know, something besides awful reality shows like "Celebrity Douchebag Magician" or "Celebrity Cruise Ship Singer"?
Hmmm...IMDB says that he did a kid's cartoon this past year called Tak & The Power of Juju. Sounds humiliating. Hal babe? It's the hair. I'm telling you. Cut it and lose the crap on your face too (and possibly fire your agent) and you'll be back in the game in no time.
I'm begging you. Do it for the children. Won't someone think of the children?!