Celebrity Apprentice

Ok, something that you should know off the top - I HATE Donald Trump. Seriously, if I saw him on the streets of NYC, I would weigh the pros/cons about kicking him in the nuts.

And generally I have hated the Apprentice franchise that NBC has been running into the ground for the past decade. I haven't watched the show since the 2nd season (except for the one season that Martha Stewart did), and the clips I have seen over the years on The Soup or other various "news" shows have been ridiculous and not in a good way.

But last season's celebrity addition seemed to be quite over-the-top and like a bad fever dream in the best possible way; what with Joan and Melissa Rivers being well, themselves, and Clint Black making a commercial where he simulated masturbating with laundry detergent? Ummm, yeah. Anyway, last year's celebrity edition has seemed to have resuscitated the series and it has a new lease on life.

The proof? Check out TWoP's link to get a gander at the celebrity contestants for Season 3. Brett Michaels and his bad wig? Rob Blagojevich and his bad hair? Sharon Osbourne who always brings a tinge of the crazy but is an insanely good business woman? Cyndi Lauper (love her)? Hottie chef Curtis Stone? Sinbad!?

Count me in people!

TV round-up: week of April 5

Short post because I'm so tired...

Cheesiest show I watched this week?
Any Dream Will Do which is a reality show on BBCAmerica that's trying to find the next Joseph to star in Andrew Lloyd Weber's latest London revival of "Joseph & His Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". This show is port-wine cheddar. With Graham Norton's narration, Lord Andrew gaying it up everywhere, and beautiful John Barrowman overdramatically dismissing the contestants at the end of each round by walking down the rows of men while they sing the "Any Dream" and tapping their shoulders. Really Barrowman overdramatically does everything on this show. SOOOOOo cheesy. Will I continue to watch it? You bet!

Biggest let-down of the week? A tie between "Kings" and "Rock of Love Bus"
Maybe it was because I watched both while at the beach on my vacation, but neither of these Sunday night staples could hold my attention at all this week. I'll continue to give "Kings" another chance, but I'm really glad that the final for RoLB is next week. Uggh - Mindy or Taya are the choices? Are you kidding me?

Show that made me feel like an old hag this week?
AMERICAN IDOL
This week's theme was "songs from the year you were born". And what were some of the tunes chosen you ask? "All She Wants To Do Is Dance", "True Colors", "Part Time Lover", "Mad World"...OH MY GOD I was in highschool when most of these songs were originally released. Going to go shoot myself now.

This week in TV

I'm keeping this relatively short because I'm really frakkin' tired; I mean, the type of tired where I think I might be coming down with something because all I can think about is my bed.
Anyway, on to my favorite subject - TV!

Rock of Love Bus - At this point I'm so over this show as much I love it. Let's be serious, Bret isn't going to actually stay in a relationship with any of these women, so the least he could do is keep the entertaining girls like Ashley, Farrah, and Beverly on. His top 3 are Mindy, Jaime, and Taya? Are you fawking kidding me?! Snorezzzzzzzzzzzzz

Kings - Still loving this new show after the first two eps. Ian McShane is GENIUS. And this Chris Egan kid is really great. I hope it continues to be inspired. It's a show that really should be on cable so I'm worried that it won't fly on NBC.

Make Me a Supermodel - So far I've agreed with all of the eliminated contestants. But I also don't seem to be connecting with anybody this season. Last year by this point in the competition I was fully devoted to Casey, Perry, and Shannon. This year, while I like Johnathan, Branden, and Sandhurst, if any of these guys were sent home I wouldn't lose sleep over it. I am loving that Jennifer Starr isn't on the judging panel this year. And I love me some Jenny Shimizu.

American Idol -
Awesome performances: Anoop, Matt, and Adam
Sucky performances: Megan "Joy", Scott
Elimination results? Predictable. But although, I would've rather seen Megan or Scott off my tv screen, I'm ok with Sarver leaving. Take care Roughneck!

Grey's Anatomy - Quality episode for once. But I am so fawking tired of patients having brain surgery without having their head shaved. At least come up with some fake medical procedure mumbo-jumbo about this new laser that exists that make it possible to do surgery while leaving a full head of lustrous hair. Because seriously? It's annoying. But it's a minor quibble considering how much the writing's improved over the last 3 eps.

Samantha Who? - It's nice to see this gem back and on a new night that I can actually watch it. And my #1 girl-I'd-go-gay-for Angie Harmon was awesome.

This Week in Season Premieres cont'd

• Rock of Love Bus - After the last two seasons of skanks including Lacey, Daisy, and Angelique, I didn't think that they could possibly find sleazier women. I was wrong. I got 2 words for ya - TWAT SHOT. I'm going to go vomit now.

• The Bachelor - Local DILF Jason Mesnik going on the "journey" again after that fickle c-u-next Tuesday Deanna broke his heart. He's looking to make a "connection" and find his "soulmate". I keep saying that I'm never going to watch this show again but there I am watching it.

• True Beauty - 10 "beautiful" people who are really the tooliest tools that ever douched compete to see who has the most inner beauty. Gag. I couldn't get through the entire hour of this crap. That's saying something considering I did make it through the entire premier of Rock of Love Bus. You're on my SHIT LIST ABC. You got rid of Pushing Daisies for this shit?!

• The Biggest Loser - Wow, these folks...wow. Just wow.

This week in TV season premieres

This first full week of 2009 is bringing a handful of shows that promise to shake the winter blues away.

The first thing I want to talk about is last night's premiere of VH1's Confessions of a Teen Idol. I talked about how much I was looking forward to this show last week, and it did not disappoint!

Let's get the Eric Nies stuff out of the way first. He is, in a word, AWESOME on this show. For some reason I've always liked Nies, and been sympathetic towards him no matter how douchey he acted on the various seasons of the Real World/Road Rules Challenge. And these days, he's like this new-agey faux Buddhist; wearing a lot of linen and hemp clothing but not wearing shoes, growing his hair long, spraying ionized kelp water on his housemates before their tasks to "cleanse their spirits". Hee! It's hilarious; and I'm sure that if I was stuck in a house with him he would be getting on my last nerve with his pep talks and lame fake Dalai Lama crap, but it's good tv. And his burgeoning bromance with Adrian Zmed touches my cold dead heart.

As for the other participants, Billy Huffsey and Chris Atkins were kind of quiet but from the previews promise to be more interesting in the coming weeks. And who knew the biggest tools of the lot would turn out to be the two dudes from Baywatch.

Next week's ep looks great; they have a focus group with women of various ages critiquing the guys "then" and "now". Should be excellent!

Also premiering last night was "Superstars of Dance"; a kind of amalgam of So You Think You Can Dance and America's Got Talent. So far it's too much like the latter for my taste. As much as I enjoyed some of the elements, I don't know if I'll stick with it for the long haul.

Good things about it:

• Pasha and Anya(!!!!) from SYTYCD. I actually squealed (alarming the cat and dog) when they were introduced.
• Getting to see awesome popper Robert Muraine again
  
• Seeing the Shaolin monks incredible routine

Bad things about the show:

• Michael Flatley as host
• The confusing rules/scoring/judging
• Michael Flatley

One of my favorite things so far in 2009

This moment from the reunion show for "Rock of Love: Charm School":

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