Things I'm loving and hating about Milan right now

• HATE the fact that I can't get the free international long distance passcode/pin to work from the hotel room phone.
• HATING Sprint who promised that my cell phone would work here and it isn't.
• LOVE Franco the hotel concierge, Swisscom operator Franciso, and the hot guy in the blue shirt at the Ristorante Avenna.
• Loving the randomly graphic phone sex commercials on Italian tv.
• Hate the fact that the map we had totally mispresented where our hotel was from the subway. I was hot and cranky by the time we got there.
• Love the nicely appointed room with the nice firm beds at the Hotel Milea Milano.
• Love that Todd and I each arrived safe and without the swine flu.
• LOVE BEING AWAY FROM THE TROUBLES of home.

Parlez vous FRAZZLED?

I'm off to France and Italy in less than 36 hours and I'm totally not ready. No packing has been started, no cleaning has been done, not even any lists made. PATHETIC.
Uggh, I've got to get my act together. I'm online right now supposedly paying bills. Instead I'm sitting around procrastinating and watching cheesy Hallmark channel movies where Haylie freakin' Duff is playing a frontier doctor in the 1880s. WTF?

Reality TV musings - April 29 edition

Just a few random thoughts regarding Wednesday night reality tv -

• American Idol: The right two people went home but I'm still really sad about Anoop. Even on those weeks when his performances were questionable - Usher? Really? - I still loved him. He'll always be my little adorkable mathlete crooner boyfriend. Here's hoping he gets his shit together and gets a nice career out of this experience (if he even wants that).

• Make Me A Supermodel: I'm SICK about Kerryn being eliminated. SICK I tell you! I'm okay with Laury getting the ax but not my Kerryn. That horrible wench Amanda should have gone home instead. Stupid move judges, stupid move.

• America's Next Top Model: Good riddance Natalie! While I'm surprised that Aminat wasn't the one sent packing because she's been in the bottom two so many times, fans of the show know that Tyra Banks hates "pretty" girls. Especially pretty girls who think their shit don't stink and backtalk to Tyra. Stupid Natalie. But she was annoying anyway so again - don't let the door hit ya...

• RW/RR Challenge - The Duel II: First I have to say, because I think I had powerful sex dreams about it last night, that watching Landon wrestling, flipping, monkeying around on those ropes during the challenge with first Mark, and then Nehemiah was totally HOT! And then seeing Evan being called into the Duel by lovely Davis was so great especially when it was revealed to be a puzzle challenge, because my big dumb Canadian is bad at those because steroids fry your brain. But sadly (so sad), Davis lost out to Evan at the last minute during the Duel which was a combo of a puzzle and rock-climbing. Sigh... so all of my gay boys are gone from this season and big dumb Evan is still there.

TV thoughts this week

Just got done watching the Ashton Kutcher interview on Larry King Live from yesterday talking about Kutcher's momentous beating of CNN to get to 1 million Twitter followers first.
Now, I was already a follower of both Ashton and CNN so I sort of felt like Switzerland, but I guess I was secretly rooting for Kutcher because he's such a loveable goofball. Sean Diddy Combs, Jimmy Fallon, and Ryan Seacrest also joined in the discussion with Larry and Ashton.
Three funny things about the segment:

1. How Larry King tries to be "hip" with the "lingo" that these "young folks today" are using. Hearing Larry say words like "tweet" and "twee-people" was fawking hilarious. And I don't think he got any of Jimmy Fallon's jokes.
2. Loved when Larry gave Ashton a set of his (used) suspenders. Hee hee Was that some kind of inside joke between the two of them or something?
3. Ryan Seacrest confirming what I always suspected must be true - he only gets 3-4 hours of sleep a night.

I continue to love Bridget's Sexiest Beaches. It's part travel show, part history, part slice-of-life reality show with my favorite dizty blonde of the moment. Also, her episode in Croatia made me want to travel there so badly, I was this close to calling a travel agent the day after I watched it.

30 Rock is almost always funny but this past week's ep was one of the best of the season. Between Jack, Jenna and "Jackie Jormp Jomp"; Liz and her building ladies and my favorite HR person Jeffrey WEINERslave; and Kenneth and Meredith Viera... SO GREAT. "Raven Symone knows what she did"...

Good job MTV!

Each season of the Real World/Road Rules Challenge gets worse and worse but I still keep getting sucked in!
Maybe it's because watching all of these douches on my tv makes me feel so much better about myself. Or maybe it's because of little gems like watching CT go absoFAWKINGapeshit on Adam because of a stupid "Three's Company" like misunderstanding.
Just watch the video; and understand that this minute and a half of footage is so tame compared to the rest of what went down during the fight. And it's made all the funnier because of little touches like the fact that Adam was fighting while wearing adult-sized footie pajamas with playing cards embroidered on them. It rarely gets better than that.

VIDEO: It’s The Return Of CT’s Violent Temper!

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Oh, and I almost forgot - SHUT UP DIEM!

TV round-up: week of April 5

Short post because I'm so tired...

Cheesiest show I watched this week?
Any Dream Will Do which is a reality show on BBCAmerica that's trying to find the next Joseph to star in Andrew Lloyd Weber's latest London revival of "Joseph & His Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". This show is port-wine cheddar. With Graham Norton's narration, Lord Andrew gaying it up everywhere, and beautiful John Barrowman overdramatically dismissing the contestants at the end of each round by walking down the rows of men while they sing the "Any Dream" and tapping their shoulders. Really Barrowman overdramatically does everything on this show. SOOOOOo cheesy. Will I continue to watch it? You bet!

Biggest let-down of the week? A tie between "Kings" and "Rock of Love Bus"
Maybe it was because I watched both while at the beach on my vacation, but neither of these Sunday night staples could hold my attention at all this week. I'll continue to give "Kings" another chance, but I'm really glad that the final for RoLB is next week. Uggh - Mindy or Taya are the choices? Are you kidding me?

Show that made me feel like an old hag this week?
AMERICAN IDOL
This week's theme was "songs from the year you were born". And what were some of the tunes chosen you ask? "All She Wants To Do Is Dance", "True Colors", "Part Time Lover", "Mad World"...OH MY GOD I was in highschool when most of these songs were originally released. Going to go shoot myself now.

TV Highlights

- Two words to say about American Idol this week - TOTALLY UNINSPIRED

WTF? These nine talented (ok, probably only about 5 are what I would call talented) people had practically the entire American fawking songbook to choose from and those are the songs they chose? And that's how they chose to perform them? The hell?

Absolutely everyone fell apart this week. You either had people like Anoop, Danny, and Matt who I think chose fine songs but didn't execute them very well; or you had people like Adam and Kris who chose two of the most f'ed out, played out, karaoke-fodder, lame songs on the planet to sing. And even though they made these songs "their own", no amount of crazy arrangement is going to make "Ain't No Sunshine" or "Play That Funky Music" any more interesting or less fawking played out. Jeezus! So disappointing.

- Masterpiece Classic: Little Dorrit

Anyone that knows me knows I'm a huge Charles Dickens fan and I love to watch the various attempts that people have made in TV productions of his works. Some hits ("Bleak House") and some misses ("David Copperfield") have been done by the BBC/PBS. Little Dorrit (an underrated Dickens' classic) firmly falls into the "hit" category. I thoroughly enjoyed the first part of the 5 hour series playing throughout April. Can't wait for more.

- Gossip Girl

I feel like I'm the only person who hates the idea of Nate and Blair back together. Uggh. Although I do have a secret thrill about Chuck and Vanessa. It's so sick and twisted but lovely. Still want Jenny to go throw herself in front of a moving train.

- "Spectacular!"

I forgot to comment about this little Nickolodeon movie about the world of competitive highschool show choirs that I watched a couple of weeks ago. So comically bad that it turned right around to being awesome. The movie's title was the name of the main characters's highschool choir team. Their main rival's team name? Ta-da! Ha ha ha ha ha heee hee hee hee Oh so funny.