This week in TV

I'm keeping this relatively short because I'm really frakkin' tired; I mean, the type of tired where I think I might be coming down with something because all I can think about is my bed.
Anyway, on to my favorite subject - TV!

Rock of Love Bus - At this point I'm so over this show as much I love it. Let's be serious, Bret isn't going to actually stay in a relationship with any of these women, so the least he could do is keep the entertaining girls like Ashley, Farrah, and Beverly on. His top 3 are Mindy, Jaime, and Taya? Are you fawking kidding me?! Snorezzzzzzzzzzzzz

Kings - Still loving this new show after the first two eps. Ian McShane is GENIUS. And this Chris Egan kid is really great. I hope it continues to be inspired. It's a show that really should be on cable so I'm worried that it won't fly on NBC.

Make Me a Supermodel - So far I've agreed with all of the eliminated contestants. But I also don't seem to be connecting with anybody this season. Last year by this point in the competition I was fully devoted to Casey, Perry, and Shannon. This year, while I like Johnathan, Branden, and Sandhurst, if any of these guys were sent home I wouldn't lose sleep over it. I am loving that Jennifer Starr isn't on the judging panel this year. And I love me some Jenny Shimizu.

American Idol -
Awesome performances: Anoop, Matt, and Adam
Sucky performances: Megan "Joy", Scott
Elimination results? Predictable. But although, I would've rather seen Megan or Scott off my tv screen, I'm ok with Sarver leaving. Take care Roughneck!

Grey's Anatomy - Quality episode for once. But I am so fawking tired of patients having brain surgery without having their head shaved. At least come up with some fake medical procedure mumbo-jumbo about this new laser that exists that make it possible to do surgery while leaving a full head of lustrous hair. Because seriously? It's annoying. But it's a minor quibble considering how much the writing's improved over the last 3 eps.

Samantha Who? - It's nice to see this gem back and on a new night that I can actually watch it. And my #1 girl-I'd-go-gay-for Angie Harmon was awesome.

Things that are annoying me today

• Why does my company insist on running the A/C when it's 43 degrees outside?! What a waste of fawking money! It's FREEZING in here dammit!
• Why and how is it that my iPod headphones are forever tangled. And not just simple tangles - tangled so badly it's as if some demon fairy has gone and braided the main cord and little Y-cords. WTF? All I did was place the iPod in my bag, or my pocket, or on my desk for crissakes! How does the cord get so fawked up?!
• F-off Starbucks drive through on MLK way! Who designed this place? Horrible entrance spaces, no sort of direction or signage to indicate where you're supposed to place your order versus pay for it. Having to go to 3 separate places in the drive-through before you get your cup-'o-joe? F'in annoying!
• F! U! Center for Medicare and Medicaid Services. No, not for anything that's connected to my job, but for messing up my dad's benefits this week. WHAT A HASSLE I'm dealing with having to get shit corrected. Grrrrrrrrr...

For the love of Eddie Cibrian

First, I'm not really a gossip hound, so this post isn't going to be about Cibrian's supposed affair with Leann Rimes. Even if Leann is strutting around with her gay husband and trying to prove that "everything's fine!"

Anyway this post is going to be filled with all of my gushy, cheesy, lovey feelings for an actor who I think is one of the most talented and underrated and of course hot things around.

Now Eddie has somewhat of a reputation of being a "show killer". Much like his female counterpart Paula Marshall, Cibrian has been on A LOT of television shows that have failed miserably or spectacularly, however you want to look at it. Here's just a small list of some of the shows Eddie's graced that then died: Vanished, Invasion, Tilt, Baywatch Nights, and most recently Dirty Sexy Money and The Starter Wife. Not to mention the times he does short stints on shows like Ugly Betty and Samantha Who? that end up going nowhere. Only rarely is there an occurrence like Third Watch which actually had phenomenal ratings while Eddie was the star and tanked after he left.

My love for Eddie Cibrian is kind of ridiculous. I will go out of my way to watch anything he's in. Stupid shows about professional poker players? Check. One-off episodes of shows I would never normally watch like Criminal Minds? Check. Horrific pilot episodes of shows that no one in their right mind is going to greenlight like Football Wives and The Street Lawyer? Check and check. Even super cheesy Lifetime movies like the one that he starred in with the above mentioned Rimes that premiered this past weekend called "Northern Lights" - I am thoroughly on board.

But seriously, he's done some quality work like Invasion that was cancelled too soon by a lame network that is no stranger to killing shows itself. Cibrian is a decent actor, and people in the industry must recognize this because they keep giving him work. But I wish he'd do something that'd make him a huge star.

Then again maybe I don't want more people to know about his talent. Or the fact that he is totally getting hotter with age. Maybe I want to keep that part to myself. And can we talk about his dimples for a moment? Sigh...

And his abs? Or how about his ass? There's a scene from one of my favorite movies, "Living Out Loud", where Holly Hunter's character orders a massage that comes with "full release benefits". Eddie plays the masseuse and at one point gets naked and basically massages Holly Hunter with his ass. It's the stuff of wet dreams people!

So I'll just go along loving Eddie Cibrian and filling my DVR with anything he chooses to act in. (grrrr I hate ending sentences in a preposition)

Happy birthday to me!

The image on the left represents how I'd like to say I'm feeling today on my 38th birthday. But I'd be lying if I said that I was channeling any Xanadu-feelgoodness.

Here instead is a small list of things I'm currently grateful for:
- I don't have appendicitis
- I have a stable job and no current financial worries
- I get to see Carras and the girls in less than 2 weeks!
- I didn't fall off the stage during either of our opening weekend performances (although I did forget to sing one song verse in Sunday's show)

And suffice to say that I feel blessed to have such a great group of friends and family who have gone out of their way to send me birthday wishes and make me feel loved and appreciated. Kisses to you all!

American Idol recap for the week March 16

This week’s theme was “Country” which I actually wish they’d saved until a little farther into the competition but whatever, it was nice to see Randy Travis as the mentor. First, he wasn’t promoting a new album or anything – he was just competently there giving advice and helping the kids. It was very refreshing.
So let’s get to the performances:

Michael Sarver – before I knew it was country songs this week, I was thinking about this theme and what song I thought Sarver would sing. I was hoping for either some Rascal Flatts or Lonestar, you know, a nice ballad like “I’m Already There”. Instead he did a really up-tempo Garth Brooks tune. But he did it well I guess. Nothing special. And I’m still disappointed that it wasn’t something like “My Wish”. Maybe neither Rascal nor Lonestar are in the Grand Ole Opry, which is what the theme specifically was?

Alison Ireheta – Still don’t believe she’s 16. She competently sang a Patty Loveless song which is actually a Dottie West song, which was perfect for her.

Kris Allen – So cute. “To Make You Feel My Love” was too cliché a song choice though. But he sung it well. I’m actually hoping he makes it to the final 3. He’s totally grown on me.

Lil Rounds – Zzzzzzzzzzzz I’m so tired of people on this show being “uncomfortable” with the different themes. She did a Martina McBride song of course. I’m over Lil…and Martina McBride.

Adam Lambert – Boy oh boy. I don’t have words. Is this guy for real? To quote Randy Dumbass Jackson, Adam “did his thing”. I just wish “his thing” didn’t also involve such an alarming amount of eye-fawking. Jeezus.

Scott MacIntyre – I’m sorry, I’ll say it. I was DAMN DISAPPOINTED that he didn’t sing a Ronnie Milsap song. It’s not just the blind thing. Milsap songs are all piano-based melodic gems that would have suited Scott very well. And Milsap is a member of the Opry (I checked). I think Randy Travis was hoping for this too. Anyway, Scott chose to sing a fawking lame Martina McBride song instead with his mediocre voice and he continued to weird me the hell out with his creepy eyes and the way he holds his mouth.

Alexis Grace – I really don’t like when other people sing Dolly songs, especially “Jolene”. Alexis’s version had a weird arrangement with timing issues, but it didn’t suck that much. I might revisit what it sounds like on the actual studio recording of it on iTunes.

Danny Gokey –Sigh…what was up with that white jacket he was sporting? HATEd the Carrie Underwood “driving Jesus” song he did. But I’m resigned to the fact that this dude is going to be in the finale.

Anoop Desai – I just LOVE my little mathlete! He was awesome and I will be buying this off iTunes for sure. And did you see his hot brother/cousin in the audience with Anoop’s adorable parents? From “zero to hero” indeed.

Megan Joy – Megan Joy? She dropped her last name? The hell? I hate poseur shit like this. She already bugged me with her faux quirky vibe and this cements my hate. She looked cool though.

Matt Giraud – First of all, I loved Randy Travis as a mentor. I would have had the same reaction upon learning that Matt was singing that damn sad Carrie Underwood song. Second, this was a surprisingly great performance. Love ya Matt!

Pet Peeves con'td

Things that have bothered me this week -

People in HUGE ass cars that park in spaces marked "Compact":

Example #1 - My friends Dan and John own a condo that came with two parking spaces. Their extra one that they let guests use is labeled for compact cars as are the spaces on either side of it. About 6 months ago their neighbor decided to rent out their extra space right next to John and Dan's. While it seems a little shady to rent a space to someone who doesn't even live in your building, that's not my problem with this. My problem is that the dude who rents the compact space drives a gigantic Chevy Suburban! And has the nerve to complain if someone parked in the adjoining space doesn't give him enough room to open his door to get out! What. A. Dick.

Example #2 - The parking lot surrounding my building at work has a plentitude of parking. But people being lazy like they are, of course try and get one of the 40 or so spaces that are very close to the building entrances. Several of these 40 spaces are marked for specific types of cars - vanpool, carpool, visitor, compact. It never fails - if I park my compact car in one of these compact spaces, when I get back to my car to go home there is a BIG HONKIN' SUV or extended cab pickup parked in the compact space next to me. Or like today, parked in the compact spaces on either side of me, so that I had to have security make an announcement on the building PA to have the jackass move their gas guzzler so that I could get into my car through a door and not my hatch. Dude with the pathetic faux-hawk who works in Provider Relations? I've got your number a$$hole.

Listen, if you want to own a large vehicle I don't care. But one of the things that comes with having a ginormous car/truck/Canyonero is that you can't park in just any space. You have to take one for the team and park at the far end of the lot. Thems the breaks.

And while we're on this theme, my second gripe tonight is - People who don't know the difference between a Yield sign and a Merge sign:

This thing to the left here? Is a MERGE sign. It's telling you and others on the road with you that traffic from one direction (in this case to the right) will be joining the traffic already moving. With merging, the folks driving on the road that's being entered (aka the thick, straight part of the arrow diagram) have the right-away.

So this other traffic sign to the right, below? This is a YIELD sign. If you see one of these at the end of the road that you're driving as it meets up with a another road? It means that you have to WAIT until the traffic, or pedestrians or whatever in the other road is clear. YOU HAVE TO WAIT!!!

Is it only the lameasses in Seattle that don't know the difference between these two? I swear. The fawkers in this city are going to push me to the brink.

For the love of Cara Cara navel oranges

I had my first Cara Cara orange yesterday evening. What a divine taste experience! These special oranges have been available in this country since the mid 1980s but only recently have been found in regular grocery stores and outlets like Costco.

Peeling the navel orange and exposing the rosy pink flesh of the orange - like a pink grapefruit - that is such a pretty contrast to the deep orange color of the skin; my nostrils were enveloped by that characteristic refreshing citrus smell of a good navel orange. Only this time it was sweeter, almost tinged with a hint of rose petals.

And then that first taste. Sweet orangey goodness but more complex than that. Other fruit flavor notes are there - nectarine, cherry, blackberry - all combine to give your mouth a treat.

I want to make juice from these ambrosiac oranges and make delicious cocktails. I want to eat the entire 10 lb bag I bought at the store. I didn't do either; instead just lazily enjoyed my sweet navel orange treat.

I was even inspired to write a haiku:

sweet orange goodness

Is that nectarine I taste?

pink fleshed ambrosia

An ode to Samoan love

I feel like I have an intimate connection with the little girl on the box of Samoas Girl Scout cookies. With the reddish brown hair cut into cute little bangs, the white mock-turtleneck, wearing the fireman's hat.
I have a whole backstory for her: her name is Ashley; she likes to draw, read, and ride her bicycle; she has two turtles named Mo and Rafael; she wants to be a nature photographer when she grows up.
More importantly her picture graces the top of the box of delicious cookie crack goodness. Gawd, it's not fair how addictively awesome Samoas are. I don't know what I love more about them - the caramel? the toasted coconut? the yummy chocolate coating? They're my downfall!
Did you know that 1 serving of Samoas is two cookies? ONLY TWO cookies?!!! Eeek!

I tried to hold out and not buy any this year. It helped that my usual source for Girl Scout Cookies, no longer works in my office and I was typically going grocery shopping very late in the evening past the time when the Girl Scouts were out hawking their evil temptations.

But tonight I had to run in to the store for my dad and there she was waiting for me front and center. 5 or 6 boxes with the little girl in the fire hat facing my way. My undoing. And whaddaya know? I happened to have exactly $4 in my pocket. Little Ashley, you're going home with me.

American Idol - 9 finalists and Wild Cards

Well, the third group of three finalists were picked to head to the top 12 of Season 8 of American Idol.

Lil Rounds, the awesome 23-year-old mom of three from Memphis; Scott MacIntyre, the blind dude who annoys the hell out of me - seriously, am I the only person who is totally creeped out by this guy? His face (and hair) are so oogy. I'm sure I'm going to hell for talking about a blind man's eyes but holy fawk that vacant stare he has weirds me out; and Jorge Nunez, the Puerto Rican guy who is I suppose sort of charming but annoying all the same. They join the other 6 finalists already chosen over the past couple of weeks: Kris Allen, Adam Lambert, Allison Iraheta, Danny Gokey, Alexis Grace and Michael Sarver. All 12 finalists will be known Thursday after the wild card round.

Cowell and the other 3 judges also chose the 8 folks that will compete tonight in the "Wild Card" round: Von Smith, Jasmine Murray, Ricky Braddy, Megan Corkrey, Tatiana Del Toro, Matt Giraud, Jesse Langseth and Anoop Desai.

I absolutely approve of Anoop, Ricky, and Matt getting another chance. But Tatiana? REALLY? Uggh. At least they didn't also pick Nathaniel. Now my man Anoop just has to bring it(!) and get into the finals.

I'm still not really sure how the wildcards are working. Is it like season 2 where the judges pick after the folks have performed? That would be nice. I don't trust America. But are the judges obligated to make it an even split with girls and guys like the past 5 seasons? That wouldn't make sense since the 9 finalist so far are mostly boys, but I don't know.

GO ANOOP!!!!!!!